Showing posts with label My Diary~. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My Diary~. Show all posts
Friday, August 14, 2015 - 0 comments

The Beautiful Dhuhaa


8.30 a.m

It was a bright sunny day as I walk along the lake on my way to attend my weekly Halaqah. I smiled as I watch a group of people having their lunch while enjoying the beautiful scenery of the Lake Garden.

I was a bit early, so I chose a comfortable place under the shade of a  big tree facing the beautiful lake and took out my phone from my sling bag, 

" My dear akhawats, Alhamdulillah, I have already arrived at the Lake Garden, I'll send the picture to our group, see you soon, In Shaa Allah, our Halaqah will start at 9. p/s: Please bring along your Quran and a Sajadah. Love you always, Sara" I texted.


 9.05 a.m

" Assalamualaikum, Kak Sara, how are you today? " Ain comes, with her other two friends, Fatimah and Salwa. " Alhamdulillah, bikhair " I replied. We sit in a circle waiting for Khadijah and Maryam to join. " We are on our way, kak Sarah, please wait for us ;) " was their text. I smiled as I replied their text; " Ok dear, kheir, In Shaa Allah, drive safe ;)".

 9.20 a.m

" Here we are! Sorry girls for being late :) " Khadijah surprised us. Ain cleared her throat and said, " Ehm, Assalamualaikum Khadijah ". Khadijah giggled. "Waalaikumsalam..hehe" she answered.
" Let start our Halaqah, girls ;), this is the best time to start, our topic today is so much related to this particular time of the day" They all looked at me puzzled. 

" What is our topic of discussion for today? " Salwa asked excitedly. I let them guess for a moment. " What time is it now, Fatimah? " I asked. Fatimah looked at her watch and said, " It is exactly 9.30 a.m, kak Sara"

" How is the day today, Maryam? Did you notice anything while you are driving just now?" " Hm, nothing special, it is a bright sunny day today!" Maryam answered confidently. " Do you know the Arabic word for this particular time of a day?" And just then, Salwa smiled and said," It is the hour of Dhuhaa." I nodded.

" You are right, Salwa, and do you know what is so special about Dhuhaa? "
" Is not that we are encouraged to pray the 2 rakaat of Dhuhaa prayer, for a blessing of Rizq?"

That is true, but why did Allah took an oath by the name of "Dhuuhaa " in Surah Ad-Dhuhaa?. We soon will learn that there are two important reasons why Allah swear by the name of Dhuhaa in the Quran." 

"What is it? What is it? " They asked anxiously.

" The purpose of oaths in Surah Ad-Dhuhaa is  to catch our attention and to make us reflect on what is happening around us. Dhuhaa literally means Morning Brightness.

" If you are used to commuting and driving in the morning, you would notice that when the sun is starting to rise it can get really bright. It may not be as hot as the noon sun, but it sure is bright. Just like today, just like right now, " I emphasised.

" The Arab used to give the name Dhuhaa to the time in the morning when the sun is at its brightest that you don't see the moon and the stars. Ad-Dhuhaa is the time when the sun is alone in the sky. Allah used "Dhuhaa" as a soothing word for His beloved, Muhammad S.A.W at the time where his people ignore and abandon him. As if He was saying, " Don't be sad, I am here with you."

"Your Lord has not abandoned you, [O Muhammad], nor has He detested [you]. ( Ad-Dhuhaa : 3)

" What happened at that time? " Fatimah inquired.

" The revelation stop coming for few days and at the same time, a group of Mushrikoon, ( one of the scholar says, it is the wife of Abu Lahab) made a sarcastic comment to Muhammad S.A.W that "your God has forsaken and abandoned you". They further commented that "God is displeased with you."Some of the mufasiroon says that it is due to this upsetting comments that this Surah is revealed. Allah was comforting the Prophet by revealing the Surah. Subhanallah.

That is something that we can take a lesson from,  the beauty of the word "Dhuhaa". If the whole world rejects you, realise that you are not actually alone in this world, because there is the One who is above the Heaven who accepts you and just like "Dhuhaa" who stands alone in the brightest, we sometimes have to be alone to shine the brightest.

Sometimes, we need that time to be alone and just spend it by talking to Him. Do you know what is the best time for it? " I asked them.They all shook their head.

" It is during Tahajud, the time where you are being alone with Allah at the one-third of the night. The feeling of being alone and talking to Him is priceless. It is something that you will never get to explain in words, but you can feel in your true heart." 

Their eyes widen. " Subhanallah, there are more story of "Dhuhaa" than I already know, it is not just about the Dhuhaa prayer, it is something more, something that we can reflect whenever we see the sun shines brightly in the sky" Fatimah concluded. " Indeed, it is not just about " what a sunny day today" but more on " how wonderful that Allah gives us the beautiful Dhuhaa " Maryam continued.

" Alhamdulillah, a new gem from today's halaqah, thank you, Kak Sara for the sharing, I hope that I can be as bright as the "Dhuhaa" whenever I stand up for my Tahajud spending my time alone with Him during the one-third of the night" Salwa prayed.We all prayed the same.

" Alhamdulillah, I'm so happy that we all can benefit from the lesson of Surah Dhuha, and that conclude our Halaqah for today. Hm, since it still Dhuhaa time, let us pray Dhuhaa together here, is it ok with all of you? "

" With pleasure " They answered.

In a hadith recorded in Sahih Muslim, the Prophet (s) said:
“Every morning there is on the bones and joints of any of you a charitable act. Every tasbeehah is a charitable act; every tahmeedah is a charitable act; every tahleelah is a charitable act; every takbeerah is a charitable act; ordering the good is a charitable act; eradicating evil is a charitable act. To fulfill that charity, it is sifficient to pray two rakats of Dhuha.” 

Wednesday, July 1, 2015 - 0 comments

How Love Feels

“Alhamdulillah, I have long forgotten how it feels to fall in love again” Maryam monologued. Maryam used to develop this habit of falling in love since she was in her secondary year of school whenever she found someone that remind her of her father. Everyone who knows her knew that she missed him very much. The only thing she has is a picture of an old man who carries her on his lap that she kept in her purse. It was her late father.
Her father passed away when she was a little girl, and over these past years, she has been brought up by her strong and courageous mother. As time goes by, she grew up becoming one who could not live without love as though it is the only primary concern in her life.
" Is it wrong to love someone, or to be loved by someone?" she wrote it in her journal. She will write everything in her journal that reminds her about happiness, and love. She just used to avoid negative thoughts to be lingering on her mind. It just reminds her of her late father and that will make her sad.
" The only thing you need is love. When you love someone, you will never be in despair " she writes. She was in the midst of writing an entry in her personal blog about " How Love Feels ".  She starts writing about all her love life and her writing just excite her readers more. 

" Your heart throbs whenever you see him, yet the idea of him in your thoughts just makes you smiles. You talk everything that relates to him which excites you. He is everything you think of when you wake up and when you sleep. Live without him is unbearable. At least, that is what I think when I first meet him, but it turns out to be the opposite. My heart feels anxious whenever I see him and those sleepless nights I got thinking about him has been a waste. I never felt at peace since I meet him. Live without him is unbearable. And that does not feel right. Is not love suppose to be everything that makes you happy?
And that makes me think, is that how love suppose to be? All this while, I always believe that when you find your true love, you have everything. I never get a chance to live with my father, and I never feel a love from a man before, and just the feeling of loving someone intrigued me in many ways... Except that it does not excite me anymore. 
Why? Deep down in my heart, I realize that it is not a true love, indeed. It is not real love suppose to be. It is not real love suppose to feel. When you love a wrong person. When you love a wrong thing. When you love other more than HIM."

Her heart throbs whenever she reads the Quran, as the idea of Him in her thoughts makes her smiles. She talks everything that relates to Him and whenever she looks anything around her, it always remind her of the verses in the Quran. Allah is everything she thinks of when she wakes up and when she sleeps. Live for Him is a blessing. That's how love feels.The feeling of true love, indeed.

"...But those who believe are stronger in love for Allah..." ( Surah Al-Baqarah: 165 )

As Maryam continues writing her thoughts, she praises Allah saying,“Alhamdulillah " for the blessings of falling in love with Him, and falling in love with His Book of Wisdom. Whenever she hears a lecture or a talk that reminds her of Allah and The Quran, she falls in love again. The feeling is priceless. And the feeling never fades. It just grew. Those who found Allah lives happily ever after and that is the truth.

Tuesday, June 30, 2015 - 0 comments


I just finish my work that evening, and as soon as I came home, my 6 years old Rayyan greet me at the front door, giggling. I was a bit surprised and curious at the same time and said, "I wonder what happen today that makes Rayyan happy, hmm...." I asked myself enough to let Rayyan hears me. " I fast today! " he answered. " It was hard, but I manage to do it well, I thought of breaking my fast in the afternoon, but I remember what Dad said to me early in this morning.."

Before I get to ask about it, he gives me the answer." Dad promises to give me something if I fast a whole day today!" he said excitedly. " And did Daddy say what is it that he want to give you?" I asked out of curiosity. " No, but whatever it is, I feel good about it!"Rayyan answered.

" What makes you feel good about it? " I try to engage in a conversation with him realising that a child of his age usually shows a rapid development of mental skills and learn better ways to describe experiences and talk about their thoughts and feelings. " I do what Dad told me to do" he answered confidently. " When someone ask you to do something and you do it, you will get something good in return, right?" he continues.

" Very good, Rayyan" I compliment him. " Do you know that Allah is the One that told us to fast when He revealed the Ayah of Fasting to the believers?". 

"O you who believe, Fasting has been decreed upon you as it was decreed upon those before you hopefully you may become from among the righteous" ( Surah Al-Baqarah :183) 

Rayyan's eyes widen as he asked," Did Allah tell us what we will get in return?". I laughed before answering, " But of course! When someone ask you to do something and you do it, you will get something good in return, right?" I winked at Rayyan as he smiles. "Allah even told us what we will get in return, do you know what is it?" I inquired.

"What is it?" Rayyan asked curiously. " You'll get to enter Ar-Rayyan."

"Is it not my name?" he looks amazed. I nodded. " Yes, it is your name and also a name of a gate in a paradise, a gate for those who observe their fasting"

“In Paradise there is a gate called al-Rayyan, through which those who used to fast will enter on the Day of Resurrection, and no one but them will enter it.They will be asked‘Where are those who fast?’ They will get up, and none will enter it but them. When they have entered, it will be locked, and no one else will enter.” (al-Bukhaari, 1763; Muslim, 1947).

Just then, Rayyan said with full enthusiasm" I want to enter Ar-Rayyan because I am Rayyan! " It pleases me hearing him saying that words.

My husband comes back from work just in time before the Azan of Maghrib called. We break our fast and prayed Maghrib together along with Rayyan. And as promised, my husband gives a book as a gift to Rayyan for his efforts in fasting on that day. And guess what is the title of the book?

"Ar-Rayyan". Rayyan grins as he sees the title of the book and said," Thank you,  dad for this lovely gift, I will read it well, as much as I love Rayyan as my name, I love it as a place for those who fast "

Surprisingly, my husband asked," How well do you know about Ar-Rayyan?". As Rayyan looks at me and shares a smile and a giggle, he answered, " It is a secret, right mum? ". I laughed.

May Allah bless us in this beautiful month of Ramadhan and make us from among those people who get to enter Ar-Rayyan, Allahumma Ameen.

Sunday, December 7, 2014 - 1 comments

A wake up call!

" It's a long road, after all. I need some rest. 10 minutes should be enough" mumbled Haya.  Traveling can be tired but fun, no doubt. But then, it is just time when Haya get into a deep sleep not realizing that one hour has passed. 

And another hour…

And another two hours…

And there goes the sunset…

She woke up looking at the bright shining moon as if the moon was saying to her mockingly, " Finally, you have woke up! Good morning sleeping beauty!" and that just pissed her off. She's late. How can she get into a deep sleep without realizing how time flies. 


Another story telling, oh! I miss writing. I miss this blog. I miss writing in this blog. I miss creating stories and write it in this blog.* wait a minute.What am I blabbering right now?*

Dear Readers, Please don't mind me, and continue reading…


Haya was on her way for a promised dinner with her friends at a Korean Restaurant nearby their hotel. They supposed to meet there at 9 pm. She keep looking at her watch anxiously while trying to catch a cab passing by the road."Oh please let me be there on time. Please oh please." She prayed.

A cab stop by looking at her waving her hand and an old man with a mustache greet her with "Assalamualaikum". Before he can utter another word, Haya interrupt him saying " Korean Restaurant, Kiara Mall nearby Kyo Won Hotel, please, and make it fast, because I'm late, and thank you! " and the conversation end. 

The old man get startled with Haya's behavior, looking at her from the front-view mirror, he murmured to himself. " What on earth must have happen to  the young girls' nowadays, where goes their manners and clothing's too, pity on them ". Looking at how Haya's dressed, he shook his head feeling sorry for her. Deep down in his beautiful heart, he prayed that Haya found her way on a true path.

20 minutes later, the cab stopped in front of the huge building of the Kiara Mall. Haya seems to be mesmerized by looking at it glowing with all the colorful decorative light and laser before she came to her sense glancing at her watch which shows half hour past nine. 

"Oh shoot!" she cursed. Just before she is about to enter the mall, the old man from the cab stop her and said," Girl, here you go!" passing her a folded piece of blue paper and left after saying," May Allah bless you!" Haya paused for a moment before she opened the folded paper and read the words scribbled on it and it touched her heart. It was a wake up call.


The memory seems alive on her mind right now. Haya closed her diary after reading it over and over again, and she cannot thank enough for the old man that she met during  her travel to Korea last year, as she grab the piece of blue paper that she slipped in her diary and look at it smiling to herself uttering "Alhamdulillah" praising Allah for all the blessing He put in her way searching the truth. That was the piece of paper with an amazing phrase that had changed her whole life until this very moment. 

Below it, it was written : " My daughter give this to me, I think you need it more."

And she turned to her laptop in front of her and start pressing on her keyboard and wrote,

Sometimes you need that someone who came into your life suddenly offering you those precious advice making you realize that you have to make a change, and that someone  is a gift from Allah to you, a sign He put in front of you to show that He loves you and want goodness for you


( " Ketika mana kita terkesan dengan nasihat seseorang, maka bersyukurlah, kerana Dia sebenarnya menghantarkan wasilah buat kita untuk kembali kepadaNya dan berubah menjadi lebih baik ") -14 October 2012, Facebook

I have this someone who wrote this and tagged me, 

 I can't remember how many times I have read this entry but it really touched my heartThe best quote I found here " what ever comes from your heart, is always about what you desire to have, and by writing it, you teach your heart to believe that anything can happen when you have a strong desire for it "Thank you Sarah Maimun Aqsha.

…and I'm thankful for her being that"someone" who came suddenly asking me, " when will you write again?" making me realize how much I missed this hobby of mine ( writing) and hoping that this piece of writing can continue to benefits her and others who read it. May Allah reward and blessed her. Amin.

This piece might be the beginning of the previous year that I have wasted while making this blog dormant for a while, and for those who happens to wonder, what happened to me for this past year , this is my answer;

" Alhamdulillah, being healthier than ever and still manage to write in this blog! " *giggles*
Thursday, January 24, 2013 - 1 comments

Writing from your heart

" What are we going to write for our next post, huh? any idea? " the girl turn to her loyal friend sitting just beside her while drinking her cafe latte. " I assume that you would know best " was her reply.

" Humph, I thought I can have some help with a different view from others rather than this brain of mine " she grumbled pointing out to her head which is covered with a blue hijab. Looking at that pitiful face in front of her, she decided; " How about a walk in the park, I say that the weather this morning is quite relaxing, may be in this way, you can get some ideas for your next post ."

The girl smile agreeably. Without hesitation, she grab her blue coat, take a glimpse of herself in front of the mirror, and step out from her big bungalow house heading to the park next to her neighbourhood.

That was a great deal by looking at a view of nature. One thing that brings one a great serenity insight one's soul. The beauty of the nature itself captured the heart of beings. The colour that blend together in harmony create a balanced ecosystem that bring peace to this world. The girl monologued. And suddenly, she pick up her lucky-pen and take a piece of paper from her black brief case eager to write another wonderful idea that has popped out from her mind that moment. Smiling looking at the lake in front of her, she wrote;

" The story begins with...."

" Hey, Maria, what you are doing alone in the park? Have your holiday started? How's collage? New friends? And by the way, have you meet Laila? I heard she move in to our neighbourhood a few months ago" There goes a tones of questions from this dear friend of her. Maria can't stop but smiling ear to ear having to meet this longed- besties-of- her. Having regain from a sudden encounter, she answered with a laughing voice;

" You sure startled me, in this time when I have this ideas ready to burst out from my brain right now, and yes,yes, it's great, a ton of them, and no, haven't meet her since I just started my holiday few days ago "

"How's that for the answers to your questions? " Maria laughed joyfully.

" Stop teasing me, oh, but I really do miss you, " she hugged Maria. Maria smiled in tears hugging her back thinking that how long it has been for them to shared this beautiful friendship. " It has been almost 10 years" she murmured herself.

" you are writing about friendship...again? " suddenly, Amy, her loyal friend come sitting beside the girl looking at the mesmerizing view in front of her. " What's wrong with it? " the girl asked looking unsatisfied. She put down her pen and turned looking directly to the girl beside her. " Tell me, is anything wrong? " she demanded.

Amy shook her head before answering; " There is nothing wrong with it, it just seem obvious to me that you still waiting for her to return, back into your life, I mean your dear friend who had been missing about three years ago, right? " The girl's eye widen in shock hearing Amy's honest comment. '

But then, the girl grinned; " You know me well, Amy". " But you know what, I always believe that, what ever comes from your heart, is always about what you desire to have, and by writing it, you teach your heart to believe that anything can happen when you have a strong desire for it " 

Amy smiled, " As expected from a writer, you sure have caught me with your 'words'. That I dare not to interfere. They both laughed. " So, what will happen next? " Amy asked curiously. The girl stared at the paragraph that she had wrote a while ago.

" That is still gonna be my secret alone " she said. " What? I thought you gonna share it with me, so that I can give you this-different-view-of-mine that you asked for just a while ago? " she teased. The girl can't help herself and burst into laughter hearing Amy's reply. " Read this, and tell me what you think of it!" she passed her the sheet of paper that she hold in her hand.

" Hm, writing something that comes from your heart, huh? Your true desire? now I know what you really want right now. " With a confuse look, she asked, " now, what? ". Amy pull her hand and hugged her whispering, " Indeed, it shows your true desire, what comes from heart touched a heart, what you really need right now, is a good company ". The girls hugged each other while tears fall down from their eyes, feeling thankful enough for this blissful moment of their friendship.

But, deep down in this girl's heart, is that the story is not about her longed friend that had been missing three years ago,  she is writing about this loyal friend of her, that her writing brings to the reality of what she really desire of from this 10 years of friendship. Indeed, Amy is her good companion that she thank for.

" And that was just about a few paragraphs from a whole unfinished story, it doesn't hurt to keep believing and keep writing, because one day, this writing of yours would become a reality in your strong and believing heart. Keep writing from your heart. " 
-Sarah Maimun Aqsha, 2013~

Thursday, August 9, 2012 - 0 comments

A 10 Years Of Friendship

" Friends on that day will be foes to one and another- except the Righteous Ones. ( Az-Zukhruf : 67 )

Time sure flies , dear friends, but as we recall the sweet memories in our life, the film will appear endlessly in our mind and  will never ends..

Just an ordinary post , I hope to share with you about how much I thank Him who gives me this blessings of having all of you as my dearest friends that I love for the sake of Him, and a bond of ukhwah that I hope that would last  in Jannah. Amin.

Remember ? dear friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

When we were in primary 6 preparing for our PSR, I was sitting in my class adoring the Institut Tahfiz Al-Quran Sultan haji Hassanal Bolkiah building just behind our school ( Sekolah Persediaan Arab ).

What comes in my thought at that moment was that  I'm going to be there one day! I can see people wearing jubah from a far and what playing on my mind at that time was that I'm going to wear it one day!

It was at the musolla when I overheard someone talking to a friend that how hopeful she is to be given the chance to continue her study in Tahfiz..and that time I murmured to myself, we will met there, one day! And you know, who is that wonderful girl? She is Ili Mardhiah :)

Subhanallah, Allah heard us, and He give us the chance to be part of it!

Remember ?  dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

When we have been selected for the interview, we were struggling to do our best to memorize a page that was given to us within half an hour time. I met Ili Mardhiah  and she was sitting beside me waiting to be called into the examination room. *He did answered my doa, we meet on the first day of the interview in Tahfiz* And as I look at her memorizing the whole page, I can see the way she struggle on it. She read it out loud and clear, and that was the moment when I first learn about one of the easy way to memorize the Quran. And just by looking at her gives me the motivation to memorize my page. Thanks Ili.

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

When we were announced and informed to be part of the tahfizians, we were at that beautiful hall, we were given a talk about our progress in the Tahfiz,And I can see the hall was crowded with families who have the same dream to see their sons and daughters succeeding in memorizing the Quran.

Alhamdulillah, we were the chosen one, among hundreds of them who took the interview, only 36 of us has been given this golden opportunity to be in this wonderful school. To tell you the truth, He is the one who choose us and give us this responsibilities to keep and spread His words to others.

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

During our orientation week, we played a game that introduces us of the real meaning of friendship, its importance and its effects to our life. Friendships turns strangers into siblings, turns unknowns  into known, turns ignorance into lovable, turns haters into lovers, and makes us strong when we parted.

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

The song that we sang together during our orientation,

' Sesegar hijau daunan,begitulah kita diibaratkan,tiada siapa yang bisa memisahkan kita, antara kita semua..'

And I say, this song will always be the precious song that we shared together.

The phrase keep playing on my mind like a recorder, that whenever I heard it, it bring back the old-sweet memories I had with all of you , and there is just one doa that I recite;

"Oh, Allah, we meet for the sake of you, and we parted for the sake of You, and let us meet again for the sake of You! 

"And I really mean it, I love having you all as my friends..

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

The first week living in the hostel was tough for some of us, never been away from our family, yup, that was my first experience too living in a hostel (although our hostel seems to be like a hotel!) but still we felt homesick that week..:-)

But do you know, how precious it is for me to live there having friends like you?

It is in the Tahfiz  that I first learn to be an independent person.

It is in the Tahfiz that I realize friends were part of our family (since we were with them all along ) and the fact that we are all siblings under one roof.

It is in the Tahfiz, that I first learn about love and friendship.

I learned about the importance of co-operation and the meaning of giving not wanting.
 I remember when it comes to someone's birthday, none of us will be left behind to be wished.

I learn that it is not the presents or how much it cost that makes one's happy, it is how much  they remember it as a friend.

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

We were at our class, 14 of us were sitting in a circle (we always do it..right,my friend?) We let out all the dissatisfaction that messing up our mind at that time to others, and I learned the importance of  listening and understanding our beloved friends and being honest to them.

Remember ? dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

When I left the Tahfiz, at the end of our second year, I really didn't have any chance to meet all of you, I just meet Hanan and Jimah, I didn't expect that it will be the last time for me in the Tahfiz , but I know Allah knows best..

Do you know my friends , I  was overwhelmed when I received a letter from you after a month I'm back in Malaysia..

I still remember that you told me to send pictures and letters to all of you but I didn't make it ,and I sincerely apologized for it.

It is in the Tahfiz that I realize how lucky I am to memorize the Quran and making it part of my life now..

As I was studying in DQ, I met some of you AGAIN..I realize how thankful I should be to Allah that He answer my prayers all the while. Alhamdulillah.

And this is what I always believe in,

QURAN unite us, QURAN will also re-unite us..

And now, we all have took our own path to success in our journey of life, I'm so happy to hear it,  but all I hope is our Quran is still in our heart just like our friendship.

Remember, dear  friends that I love for the sake of Allah...

We put our life and hope in order to live as a tahfizians, memorizing the Quran, do you wish to leave it now?

Remember, we memorize it and it is our responsibility to keep it and work with it..

 Isn't a waste, for the opportunities that Allah has grant upon us, but we neglect it , right,my friends? Reminding myself above others.

And you know what is my hope?

I hope that  one day, I will be given the chance  to visit  Brunei, and see these  professional friends of mine that make the Quran part of their life, continuing in memorizing and understanding the real meaning of the magic phrases in the Quran..

I really hope to see you all again one day, brothers and sisters..Amin..


Did I forget someone?(giggles..)

( A tribute to my dearest friends of Institut Tahfiz Al-Quran Sultan Haji Hassanal Bolkiah Intake 2003) _Ukhwah fillah abadan abada!!_

Sunday, August 5, 2012 - 0 comments

A gift of love ( PART 3)

And those who pray, "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous. ( Al-Furqaan: 74)

" Oh, so you're getting married? " my friend was delighted to hear my story. " Oh, I'm so happy for you, so, I can see that is a good news, after all, why with the unsatisfying look? my friend try to figure out what makes me so tense at that time. And I told her what is playing in my mind," It's just that...I haven't meet him, and the only thing I told my mother when she asked about my answer to the proposal is : Let me meet him."

My mother was quite shock with the answer, and said: " Are you being doubtful, it is as if you are confused, dear, is anything wrong? "

" No, its not it, I'm just being doubtful about myself, if I'm good enough for a man like him, he memorize the Quran, and he educated well, and all I want is a man that is please with me the way I am. "

" Dear, have you forgotten the doa' which I taught you long ago? " my mother smiled.

" Oh Allah, if You let me marry someone, let it be someone that whenever I looked at him, he will remind me of You, so that our marriage will bring us closer to You " I recited.

That is the reason why I like to meet him before I decide anything, I want to make sure if he is the one that I'm looking for all these years. I'm not looking for a perfect man, but I'm looking for a man that try his best to become a good one.

My friend looked at me and listen attentively, " oo, I see, so , when will you are going to meet him?"  Next week, Insya Allah, "I answered. " Do pray for me, dear"

"I will" we exchange hug and bid farewell before taking our leave. ' Oh, thanks for the treat, by the way, next time, it will be my treat!" I added.


The day we met goes smoothly. And the answer he gave me convinced me enough. " I want to complete half of my deen", he said. And as I believe, Istikharah is not all about seeing signs in a dream, but when your heart feels calm and tranquillity, and you accept it with agreeable and ease, that is when His signs is bestowed upon us. The sign of affection and mercy.

" And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought. ( Ar-Rum: 21 ) "


Just after the day of our marriage, we had a short conversation;

" Why do you choose me? I asked. " I don't choose you, Allah chose you for me" he answered.

" I'm not the perfect girl you are looking for. I don't memorize the Quran like you do." I'm testing him.

And he give me this meaningful answer; " I'm not looking for a perfect girl, I'm looking for a good one. it's okay, that you don't memorize the Quran, because I'm looking for a girl that can listen to me reciting the Quran and she will look at the Quran while reciting it with me, but to memorize it is optional, I believe."

I smiled meaningfully before he added; " When I recite without looking the Quran, I get a reward, but you look and recite it with me, and you get double of the reward."

And that just makes me grin wider.

But, then, I try to test him more." What if you find something that will make you feel irritable of me? I asked him directly.

And this is his beautiful answer," I pray that Allah gives me patience in dealing with you and gives you patience in dealing with me"

Subhanallah, is there any greater gift that Allah can give to a woman when she becomes a wife than A PIOUS HUSBAND?  And I praised and thanked Him with the gift that He grant upon us. A gift of love.

Indeed, when you becomes a " Fatimah ", you will get a "Ali". Be 'her' and you'll get 'him'.

" ...good women are for good men and good men are for good women.." An-Nur: 26

" O Allah, I seek for Your Love, and the Love from those who loves You and practices that leads me to Your undeviating love, Amin" 
Saturday, July 21, 2012 - 0 comments

A gift of love ( PART 2 )

“ Darling, you know what date is today, right? “ I looked at my mother and answered; of course, it’s Friday, mum!”.  “ Just if you had forgotten, Kak Limah and her family will come tonight, can you make it tonight? “ 

“ Alright, mum, I’ll make sure I make it on time,  Insya Allah, I have to go now, Assalamualaikum.” Just then, my mother remind me;

“Ehm, ehm, forget something?” I turned and smiled before I take her hand and kissed it, “ make du’a for me, mum? “ I smiled hoping for her blessings. There is a saying, that I will always remind myself of, about the best deeds in this world,

Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) has said: “The best deeds are: Prayer in its stipulated hour, goodness towards parents and Jihad in the way of Allah.”

 And, to see my parents smile indeed, give me the warmth in my heart, the feeling of being blessed. And I drive to the collage to start my usual routine as a lecturer, I teach my students and help them with their learnings, at the same time, I  hope that I can serve this small group of ummah in finding their way towards the real success, as I always advised them;

Abu Darda’ ( rahimahullah ) mentioned; “ A person will not be an ‘alim , until he is a person who is a seeker of knowledge,  and you will not be an ‘alim, with that ‘Ilm until you are a person who acts upon that ‘Ilm”

Oh, and this advice includes me and you, too! =)

Being a lecturer has been my dream, this entire life, and Alhamdulillah, Allah grant it for me, and it is with His help that I had achieved until what I have become today. And every time, I felt this joyous moment of being loved by Him, I can’t help but recalling the song I used to listen to, sung by Maher Zain, “ I love You So “ and prayed;“ Oh, Allah, don’t ever let me be misguided in every moment of my life, show me the way and let your love be in my heart “


As soon as I arrived at home that night, I was quite shocked on the arrival of the unknown guest. Just then, I remember the conversation I had with my mother that early morning before I go to work.

“ Oh, this could be Kak Limah and her family, I murmured myself. I greet them with  salam and a smile, but yet this-innocent-me could not catch on to their real intention on visiting us that night. Until, my mother happily expressed;

“ They come for a proposal.”

 “ On what?” there goes this innocent child, again.

“Marriage, of course, what other could it be? “ And before I could think long for all the question that occupies my mind at that time, my mother aided me with the answers.

“ He is my friend’s son. He’s quite your age, an engineer who memorizes the Quran. Now, he’s doing his PHD in Wales. He’ll be back in 2 months. Oh, actually, he had been here last year during Raya, but I assumed that you would not have noticed him.  I’ll let you decide; give me your answer, later, ok? “

Suddenly, for all these years, being a student and a lecturer, having to reply those difficult and challenging questions inquired by my lecturers and my students, I have no doubt, that I can find the answers in books or through my learning experiences, but, yet, I didn’t have the answer for this easy and straight-forward query, by my own mother.

All I need now is an answer from Him!

Subhanallah, could you think a day that we lived without having to turn to Him in supplication?

 We are just a human being created upon His mercy, and live upon His Mercy, and you think that we don't ever need to ask for His Mercy? Even soul mates are given as a mercy from Him. Right?

And during the last third of the night, He witnessed the hopeless girl who supplicates to Him, for guidance and mercy upon the best choice for her Istikharah. And as tears falling from her eyes, she remembered, a quote from her dearest mother, when she asked, about her father;

“ Mother, how come you know that father is the right guy for you? Haven’t you got a number of proposals before meeting him? Why did you refuse them and why did you choose him? “

My mother smiled meaningfully before answered; “ I make a do’a ever since I ‘m in your age, and He granted it, I never feel regret that I married on my late 20’s, when all my friends have been blessed with an early marriage, because having to meet your father and let he becomes my life partner is the greatest blessing I had ever get, it’s A GIFT OF LOVE

“ Oh mother, what is the du’a? Tell me, tell me!” And my mother laughed.

“What is it?” I asked curiously.

“ It seems just yesterday, I hold your little hand when you’re just a baby, I just didn’t realize that you have grown up being a lady, a muslimah, Insya Allah”

“And, the du’a is…”. I smiled, as I repeated the du’a in my heart, and promised myself, “ To love Him before him is a must that would surely brings you an ultimate happiness in life, a gift of love”

Thursday, July 19, 2012 - 0 comments

A gift of love ( PART 1 )

I felt something churning in my stomach. I can't really think well.  I take a book and read, but in minutes, my head just like wondering other things. What just happen to me? It seems I am losing my focus right now. I thought of getting something to eat but just received disappointment upon looking at my empty fridge. " I need to go to the market " I monologued.

When suddenly, a phone rings, and luckily, it was from my dearest friend whom happen to just arrived from a 2 weeks vacation in Sydney. The call somewhat made my day, as I was alone and really need someone to talk to right now, we decided to meet in a cafe house that evening.

“ What happen to you? You look thin, I remember , the last day I saw you, you are cheer as ever, it seems you encounter problems lately? Or just missing me too much? hehe “ I smiled thankfully, she always have a way to make me felt content enough just seeing her, As what I expected would have  been blurt out by my dearest friend, oh, she always have this remarkable strong of mind, no kidding, I remember the day when I met her in school, and she said, “ hey, you’re the girl I met at the shop yesterday, the one who wore the blue dress, and a white scarf, buying the blueberry cake, right? ,not to mention,  in details, yup, that’s her. And to think these past 12 years I had known her, I had no doubt that she will still remember our old times in school as teenagers. We are grown up now. We have our own work and family to attain to, but these just making our bond of friendship getting closer.

And, that moment, I just felt like bursting into tears and tell all that had been distracting my mind all the while, but something stop me from doing it, it’s my pride. And just then, I told myself, " You need time, to figure this out, before you get anyone else involved in your problem right now. Be patient, find your own solution, only then, you ask for your friend’s advice"   I just regard her with a "nothing" and smiled pretending to be all right, but this clever friend of mine seems to notice it, and she said, “ If you have a problem, split it out, don't hide it too long in your heart, it might be a disease , you know, sometimes, we really need someone to talk to apart from Allah, of course, isn’t it our nature, itself?"

“But..” I try to deny, before then she continued,”  Isn’t this is what you want all along having to meet me here, to talk about your problems? “  She really knew me well, I can’t even hide it from her, she had figure it out long ago, before our meeting. This is what I really like about her, she always there, to talk to, to lend her ear and eyes, to listen to my problems, since the day I met her, she had been a friend that I long to search for and I ‘m glad that Allah destined me to meet her. ALHAMDULILLAH.

“ Hm….but…” before I can finish my line, my friend cut in “ now, what? “ “ I really want something to eat, hehe, it seems my stomach is rumbling begging for some dishes” My friend laughed joyfully;
“ haha, I bet you can eat anything right now!”
I can’t help but smile. We decided to continue our conversation after maghrib prayer and headed quickly to the mosque nearby. The soothing voice of an Imam reciting the Quran somehow made my heart in tranquility. Before long, the call of Maghrib prayer was heard and we took our ablution and prepared ourselves for the Jemaah prayer.

I took the chance to greet other’s jemaah after we had finished performing our prayer. It was a pleasant scenery to watch indeed, I always have this attached feelings whenever I’m in a mosque, it feels that my heart had found the place where it belongs, “ Hey, you seems quite lost in your thought, what are you thinking?” my friend patted me from behind, I turned to face her and smile, sincerely, I answered
“ Nothing much to tell, I just feel tranquil "

“So, what is it that you want to talk about, I ‘m  all ear! “ my friend said anxiously. I was a bit reluctant to tell at first, but seeing that eager face in front of me, that always find a way to comfort me, I exhaled and begin to tell my story. And within the moment, the memory seems so fresh playing on my mind , and to begin with…
Sunday, March 25, 2012 - 0 comments

Him or him? You choose :)

Bismillah, my friend once asked me, "who's your dream guy?"
And what I usually answered was," It would probably be one of the manga's characters in comics *dayreaming*^^"

*cut it off*

So, it was actually at those time when one of my dearest friend confess to me; " I love someone, but I know it is not the right time, what can I do?"

I smiled at her, quoting what my sister used to say, " To love Him before you love him is a must that will surely brings you an ultimate happiness and serenity of life "

It reminds me of her, and there is nothing that I would like to say, except this dua' that really catched my heart;

Let us love Him before him,ayte?:)

Tolong sampaikan kepada bakal imamku..

Tolong beritahu si dia, cinta manusia bakal membuatnya alpa..

Tolong nasihati sia dia, jangan menyintaiku lebih dari dia menyintai Yang Maha Esa..

Tolong nasihati si dia,jangan mengingatiku lebih dari dia mengingati Yang Maha Kuasa..

Tolong nasihati si dia, jangan mendoakanku lebih dari dia mendoakan ibu bapanya..

Tolong katakan pada si dia, dahulukan Allah kerana di situ ada syurga..

Tolong katakan pada si dia, dahulukan ibu bapanya kerana di telapak itu syurganya..

Tolong ingatkan si dia. Aku terpikat kerana imannya bukan rupa..

Tolong ingatkan si dia. Aku lebih cintakan zuhudnya bukan harta..

Tolong ingatkan si dia aku kasihinya kerana santunnya..

Tolong tegur si dia, bila dia mula mengagungkan cinta manusia..

Tolong tegur si dia, bila dia tenggelam dalam angan-angannya..

Tolong tegur si dia, andai nafsu mengawal fikirannya..

Tolong sedarkan si dia. Aku milik Yang Maha Esa..

Tolong sedarkan si dia. Aku masih milik keluarga..

Tolong sedarkan si dia, tanggungjawabnya besar kepada keluarganya..

Tolong sabarkan si dia, usah ucap cinta di kala cita-cita belum terlaksana..

Tolong sabarkan si dia, andai diri ini enggan dirapati kerana menjaga batasan cinta..

Tolong sabarkan si dia, bila jarak mejadi penyebab bertambah rindunya..

Tolong pesan padanya. Aku tidak mahu menjadi fitnah besar kepadanya..

Tolong pesan padanya. Aku tak mahu menjadi punca kegagalannya..

Tolong pesan padanya aku membiarkan Yang Esa menjaga dirinya..

Tolong khabarkan pada si dia. Aku tidak mahu melekakan dia..

Tolong khabarkan pada si dia. Aku mahu dia berjaya dalam impian dan cita-citanya..

Tolong khabarkan pada si dia, jadilah penyokong dalam kejayaanku..

Tolong sampaikan pada si dia. Aku mendambakan cinta suci yang terjaga.

Tolong sampaikan pada si dia,cinta kerana Allah tidak ternilai harganya..

Tolong sampaikan pada si dia, hubungan ini terjaga selagi dia menjaga hubungan dengan Yang Maha Kuasa..

Tolong sampaikan kepada si dia kerana aku tidak mampu memberitahunya sendiri...

Hanya engkau Ya Allah mengetahui siapa si dia.. Moga pesananku sampai padanya walau aku sendiri tidak mengetahui siapa dan dimana si dia.. Moga dia seekor lebah yang sentiasa memuji keagungan Yang Maha Kuasa memasuki taman larangan dengan sopan santunnya dan bertemu mawar berduri yang terjaga oleh tuannya..

Simpanlah pesanan ku ini sehingga engkau bertemu dengan si dia suatu hari nanti...

A friend once quoted this,

‎ We don’t need to rush things, if somethings are bound to happen, it will

happen…in the right time, with the right person and with the best


We usually heard a verse in Surah An-Nur, 26;

"Vile women are for vile men, and vile men for vile women. Good women are for good men, and good men for good women; such are innocent of that which people say: For them is pardon and a bountiful provision."

But I believe in our struggle in becoming a good muslim, we should pounder upon these verses from Surah al-Mu'minun, 1-11;
" Indeed are the believers. Who are humble in their prayers. And who shun vain conversation, And who are payers of the poor-due; And who guard their modesty , Save from their wives or the (slaves) that their right hands possess, for then they are not blameworthy, But whoso craveth beyond that, such are transgressors ). And who are keepers of their pledge and their covenant, And who pay heed to their prayers. These are the heirs, Who will inherit paradise. There they will abide. "

May we becomes from those whom HE guides and loves, Amin! Peace :)