Faith in Him Most

It has been 2 years since I last visited Medan and 12 years before,back then when I was just a little girl..yet I didn't recall anyone I've met in 5 years age time..but it seem this time makes my journey a lot than just a memory but a strong connection of family.
Of course my father was the most excited* truly,I can see from his face and sparkle eyes*, I know exactly how he felt,being apart from the family after 20 years living in Malaysia,he seems to miss them very much although my parents did took every opportunity in going back to my father's hometown in every event they have there,but still it is incomparable than having to live there-since my father grew up there;)..it sure left him the most precious memories in his entire life.

OK,I haven't mention the real purpose I'm here in Medan,actually my parents( as usual) was invited to my cousin's wedding,Kak Maisyarah(the oldest from her siblings and the oldest among us (cousins) too,she is 23,by the way..),so here we are in an airbus AK450,HAHA,still remember the flight serial number:)and since the weather is in a good condition,I fortunately can enjoy the scenery of the cloud floating by where the sun shining beautifully that early morning*OK,I admit,for my entire life riding in the airplane,this is the first time I ride it without falling asleep..since I'm one an easy-going snoozer*shh*..especially when I'm riding the plane at night..(but of course,it is night,rite?)

We depart from LCCT around 7.20a.m,and safely arrived at Medan Poloniya airport at 7.20 a.m(their time)As we arrived,my father has awaited us* long enough, I think* with a huge van,I assumed it's from the hotel we're staying,(how come my father is in Medan?He took an early flight a day before us due to attend a conference here in his hometown)when suddenly a boy approach us begging for pennies and surprisingly he was crippled..Pity flows in my heart and that time I whispered,'Oh,how difficult would that boy having in his entire life?'..How forgetful I am with my life?Subhanallah,save this boy,Ya ALLAH,give him strength..'I prayed..

Alhamdulillah,our shedule there was fully-packed with having to visit my father's family,not to mention,food is easily found here with an affordable rate too!Like what Om Kudri said,Medan was full of restaurant,they just like to eat,RM2.50 for a person is enough to make them full - can you imagine how cheap the rate there?but one thing makes me curious enough,how they maintain their weight?I just laughed hearing Om Kudri replied..'di sini harus kuat kerjanya!'
That night we have our dinner* makan aja sih..hehe* at Pak Haidar' house about half an hour ride from our hotel,I'm surprised that the road was still busy..'Macet' nya Om Kauthar...and although the road was not as systematical as in Malaysia,I can say that Medan's driver was a success,they seldom having accidents here..they seems to know where to go..but one thing I can't stand whenever we're on the road is the way they sound other drivers who pass their way,using horn..OK..that thing is quite annoying..but still I thanked Allah the most graceful,although I'm in a hectic road fulled with people, but still I can seat back in an air-conditioned car felt save rather than walking in the middle of busy road like in Medan..Alhamdulillah..

As we stop on the traffic light on the way to Pak Haidar's house, my sister pointed out of the car's window mentioning to a little girl around 2 years old sitting just beside the street.she was wearing a cloth covering her head looking pathetic as the car passing by her..
"Where can her mother be around this hour leaving her child beside the street,Ya ALLAH,how pity for her..hearing my mother,

"Kalau anak kite masa ni dah nak tidur dah.."make me realised how thankful should I be,but still to see such scenery makes my heart ache for the irresponsible parents out there..
"Maybe they face complications in their life..you should be more grateful with your life.."my sister blurt out.Sure,I do agree with that..Alhamdulillah..

And at that time, I thought,how thankful that my family in Medan was still in a good condition although their houses is rather small to compare to the houses in Malaysia,they still have place to live and shelter from the rain,food to eat and they all educated well..Alhamdulillah..





Seeing my family there make me realised how fortunate I'd be for living in Malaysia but still very lucky to have them as a family in Medan..I can see they all work hard to live well..something spark in my mind that time..

"The man who can drive himself further once the effort gets painful is the man who will win."
Roger Bannister

"I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection."Thomas Paine ..

And that was what I can see in them..


And that time,is when I realized happiness around us as I saw my father gathered around with his other 6 siblings..my 2 Om* pakcik* and 4 tante*makcik* on the day of the wedding...I saw them laughing recalling back the time,I assumed,their childhood;)and wiping tears just like others big loving family whenever we are leaving...and playing with my oh-so-naughty cousins(they're 10 all of them)..it was a tired day after all but I WAS SURE HAVING THE FUN!!!


Seeing them success in their study also make me proud,"jumpa nanti di menara gadingnya!"was their quote,I felt the bond is getting stronger in every moment.And the 3 days I'm having in Medan surely isn't enough for me to have a great time sharing with them as they all*my cousin* are having schools in Saturday..and we are sheduled packed..*I did mention it before,rite:)*

But still,I hope that I can see them again soon..Remembering what my sister said before we're take off..

"We are malayndon after all!!"haha,yea..Its run in our blood..

Tante Marni,thanks for the invite,
Kak Maisyarah n Bang Rizal..happy newly-wed!!*Oh by the way,she is expected!*I'm going to be an aunt..hehe
actually ka maisarah nikahnya bulan satu,ini pestanya!!*gaye medan*^^
And to all my other cousins and family..miss you all and hope to see you again soon...

Medan is my second home,after all!
Wasalam...

"Tears falling down as they talk,and speechless was the only word to describe the moment.."commented one of participant.

Alhamdulillah,ALLAH gives me the opportunity to feel the experience and becoming one of the ESQ big and lovable family,not only I met new friend of my own age but also 'seniors' from different kind of background.It was full of unexpected things happen around us within the 3 days course..


I can see some people who finally find their true self not only we manage to seek our hidden potential yet we also get to feel how the bond between us as 'Hamba ALLAH' and ALLAH really can create a success man in his life..

Based on the trainer's experience,they really succeed in opening our eyes of the real happiness in our life..As PAK YAN and PAK ANDI,our Indonesian trainers not to forget ABANG FAIZI,the one and only Malaysian trainer there always said,

"close your eyes and feel the truth within your heart, because it is not our eyes that blind but it is our heart!"

"Do they not travel through the land, so that their hearts (and minds) may thus learn wisdom and their ears may thus learn to hear? Truly it is not their eyes that are blind, but their hearts which are in their breasts"
(Surah al-Haj:46)

And every time "Read with the name of your God(ALLAH)" echoed in the auditorium,that is when I felt the bond is getting bigger in my heart as well others,I can't really explain it but this is what makes my heart grow stronger in faith to ALLAH..

I felt it in my heart with my eyes closed,I felt it in every of my 'sujud' but the most unforgettable and momentous is when I felt the He hears me and that He is so close to me at that time...and that time,I really can't stop my tears from falling down..
How forgetful are we?How arrogant are we?*reminding myself before others*

"And swell not thy cheek (for pride) at men, nor walk in insolence through the earth; for Allah loveth not any arrogant boaster.
(Al-Luqman:18)

Have we forget what we had promised in the Quran?

"When thy Lord drew forth from the Children of Adam - from their loins - their descendants, and made them testify concerning themselves, (saying): "Am I not your Lord (who cherishes and sustains you)?"- They said: "Yea! We do testify!" (This), lest ye should say on the Day of Judgment: "Of this we were never mindful"
(Al-A'araf:172)

How can we forget that we are alive now holding our promise to the only God(ALLAH)?
Astaghfirullah,how can we bring up ourselves to HIM in the day of Judgement?

It is something that sometimes I forget too..
Astaghfirullah...

And that time whenever it remind me,I just put up my hands while reciting this in my heart;

"Our Lord!" (they say), "Let not our hearts deviate now after Thou hast guided us, but grant us mercy from Thine own Presence; for Thou art the Grantor of bounties without measure."
(Al-Imran:8)

Forgive Me,Ya ALLAH..
Guide me in my way and never let me go astray...
Amin..

Special thanks to my ANGAH for introducing me to this course...


And for the Big and Happy family of ESQ,I REALLY MISS YOU ALL

and for my friend out there who really interested in joining our family,do it as soon as possible:)
because I just can say it as a priceless pearl...

"Feel the experience"

-Ketika kita tidur malam nanti, belum tentu kita akan bangun esok pagi. Ketika kita baring, belum tentu kita mampu bangkit dan menikmati keindahan sinaran mentari.-
Dr. Ary Ginanjar Agustian

p/s: Hopefully can join the next course( Mission and Character Building) this May,INSYA ALLAH:)

One day a father ask his child,' How about a quiz for you, young man in this bright beautiful day?'

His child nodded excitedly'but of course,father!'

'There was a child who was born as an orphan.His father died before his birth.His mother died too shortly thereafter and has been raised by his uncle onwards,do you know him,my child?

He nodded and answered,' He is Muhammad,the chosen one!'

His father continue..'Who is a humble merchant who could not read or write but has change the face of Arabia and has influence every corner of the world with his both religious and secular successful level?

He smiled and answered,'He is Muhammad,the chosen one!'

'With eyes as bright as the sun, a reality on his lips more brilliant than the light of the sun, a heart more fresh than the flowers of the garden, habits and morals more decent than the moon, Who is the great man,my child?'

Again,he replied the same answer,'He is Muhammad,the Chosen one!'

' What guidance that he had left for us as a legacy that he promised during his farewell speech,whoever hold fast to them,they will never go astray?'

'Quran an as-sunnah,father!'He answered.

'Indeed,my child,and he is the one who loves you,who love every single person in this world,loving his ummah wholeheartedly until even on the day of his death still managing to call out his ummah.'ummati,ummati!,right?'
He nodded.

'And so,this is my real question,my child'

'How do you show your love to him,my child?

He was speechless..and he held his head low staring at the floor.

His father smiled looking at that innocent face and said,' most of people, I do believe knew about Muhammad,the last prophet,but seldom they remember to thank him for bringing up the light to this world.'

His child held up his head full of curiousity in his eyes,'but how can we show our love or thank a person that is not here any longer?

'my child,how you show your love towards ALLAH is how you're going to show your love towards Muhammad..'

Knowing the child is still looking in a blank,his father giggled and continued,' How you obey Allah,that's how you're going to obey Rasulullah, follow his guidance in Sunnah!'

'How you pray to Allah,everyday, that is how you're going to pray to Allah in giving peace upon the Messenger,Muhammad!'

'How you knew He love us more that everything in this world,that is how you'll show him you love him by being the best in this world!'

'How he show and guide us in every of his doing during he lives, that is how you'll going to follow at this time when he is no longer to be here with us!'

Because my child,he loves us 3 times more than he love his ummah back then when he alived,'

'I didn't get it,why is it?'his child asked anxiously.

'because we follow his guidance showing that we believe in him and remembered him in our daily life even when we never saw him,how fortunate we are,get it?'

He nodded feeling amazed enough..

'and when we remembered him and pray for him,that is when he will be remembering us and pray for us in the Day of Judgement..'continued his father.

He nodded understanding what his father had spoken to him,and smiled.

'how lucky we are,right,father?'

'Indeed,my child,indeed.'

'Indeed in the Messenger of Allah(Muhammad),you have a good example to follow for him who hopes in( the Meeting with) Allah and the Last Day and remembers Allah much.
(Al-Ahzab: 21)


In a time of darkness and greed,
It is your light that we need,
You came to teach us how to live,
Muhammad Ya Rasulullah...

You were so caring and kind,
Your soul was full of light,
You are the best of mankind,
Muhammad khairil khalqillah...

From luxury you turned away,
And all night you would pray,
Truthful in every word you say,
Muhammad Ya Rasulullah...

Your face was brighter than the sun,
Your beauty equaled by non,
You are Allah chosen one,
Muhammad khairil khalqillah...

I'll try to follow your way,
And do my best to live my life,
As you tought me,
I pray to be close to you,
On that Day and see you smile,
When you see me...

Sollu 'ala Rasulillah habibil Mustofa,
Peace Be Upon the Messenger,the Chosen One~

-The Chosen One,Maher Zain-

(Salam Maulidur Rasul)

Salam

I'm safely home right now,manage to smile when ever looking at myself in the mirror*not to mention,having this braces did make me felt uncomfortable and pained*

Having to see Dr. Albira( my full-of-patience doc ) every 2 weeks sometimes do make me sick, it's just that I'm not really in a a very least of interested when talking about hospitals*especially when I'm going to see a DENTIST*

But,as the saying, Done what you've started make me a little bit aware of what I've got myself into..and hope this 2 years time will give me the strength to do this..*Having my appetite lost too,sigh*

No whining,please..*reminding myself*

Remind me of a song my sister showed me yesterday,truly, I'm touched..sang by AHMED BUKHATIR



The pain I felt is not that bad after all to compare with other injuries..( at least,alhamdulillah, I had never been in a serious injury..wana'uzubillah )

People just tend to whine whenever something unpleasing happen*including me*,feeling bad to ourselves, yet didn't realised to WHOM actually they felt bad to?

"Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere. Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return.They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance"
(Al-Baqarah: 155-157)

If we think a while, how many people around us suffer with what-ever-kind- of misery or illness that sometimes even ended in death..*na'uzubillah* and yet we complained of our distress in work...*reminding myself*

We wish to be like others yet we didn't satisfied on what we had got in ourselves..
We just keep complaining and whining...

We want to be as beautiful as the models out there yet we didn't realised ALLAH had made us as the most beautiful creatures on earth.

We have indeed created man in the best of moulds,
( At-Tin:4)

Let us show our gratitude...towards HIM..
Thank You ALLAH..

"Who created me, and Who guides me; it is He Who gives me food and drink, And when I am ill, it is He Who cures me; Who will cause me to die, and then to life (again); And who, I hope, will forgive me my faults on the day of Judgment" ( As-Syua'ra: (78-82)

Wallua'lam